I am fairly positive that milk gives me cavities.
Every time I go to the dentist, an old filling has to be replaced or I have a new cavity in a tooth I forgot existed. Hello, aren't fillings made out of a metal compound? How does that break down in the mushy, 98 degree cave that is my mouth? It's not like I'm eating drill bits for breakfast over here.
Understandably, I avoid the dentist as much as possible. Which only makes things worse. Last night, upon realizing that yet another old filling appears to be on its way out and commenting to Jon on said traitor tooth, he goes to me:
"That's because you have doody-ball teeth."
And then breaks into hysterical laughter. He continues to mutter "doody-ball teeth" to himself repeatedly over the next two hours, cackling away.
This gave me a mortifying flash-forward of Jon ten years from now, laughing hysterically and pointing at me with our future small child, singing "The Doody Ball Teeth" song. Followed by the child informing me that milk gives it cavities and as such, they would like a bowl of Captain Crunch with Mountain Dew instead.